


to the test of himself

by jestbee



Series: Appetite & Defiance [1]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - BDSM, BDSM, Dan POV, Dom/sub, Dom/sub Play, Dominance, M/M, Masturbation, Sex Club, Smut, Strangers to Lovers, Submission, dom!dan, references to Dan/OCs but not depicted, sub!Phil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:35:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23718310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jestbee/pseuds/jestbee
Summary: "Did you get curious about the things that go on here?"Phil nods.  "Yes…um, I did.""YesSir," Dan corrects him, gently, before nodding. He takes direction well. "Okay then, Phil. What do you want to do with that curiosity?"
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Series: Appetite & Defiance [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1783114
Comments: 14
Kudos: 150





	to the test of himself

**Author's Note:**

> Endless thanks to Jude and Puddle who put up with my erractic tendancy to write nothing for months and then shove 6k of d/s smut of them over the course of 2 days. Thank you for putting up with me <3
> 
> Title from I sing the body electric by Walt Whitman

Dan stretches, rolling his shoulder and feeling a pop that can't be heard over the music. He takes a sip of the coffee in his hand, the crisp white china of the cup glinting under pink light that flashes over his left arm. He's starting to unwind, to feel the busy work week slip away into the thud of bass. The dark comforting walls of _Body Electric_ are his ritual on a Friday, and the scent of bodies moving together is almost enough to loosen any stress built up over the week. Almost. 

He's in one of the booths, high-backed seats on either side in black leather, the rest of the floor open beyond a gap between them. These are usually places for people to come and play before retreating to one of the rooms. Public or private. But Dan likes to sit here and survey things, let the music pulse through him and ruminate on what the night will bring. 

Sometimes he has plans from a previous week, sometimes someone will stop him on his way in, and he can skip this part, but sometimes it is good to come without an agenda, to give himself over to _Body Electric_ and what it has to offer. 

Tonight, there is nothing planned, and Dan has no particular desires in mind. The good thing about _Body Electric_ is that he knows he's going to have a good time, regardless of what happens. All he can see tonight is the same familiar faces he sees all the time, and while he isn't opposed to any of them, has sampled what they have to offer on numerous occasions, he can't help but wish there was something new. He does so love _new_ , in every sense of the word.

Just as he's thinking this, a blonde in skin tight shorts and a crop top slides into the booth next to him. 

"Daniel," they say.

"Jazz." 

"How are you this evening?" 

"Good," Dan tells them, "and you?" 

Dan rests a hand on the side of their neck, his thumb brushing softly against their pulsepoint. Jazz's eyes flutter shut for half a second, and they bite down on their bottom lip. 

He pushes his legs out further into the booth, brushing the soft bareness of their calf. They look over, diverting their glance down automatically, not meeting his eyes, and Dan knows they're thinking back to the last time they were in a scene together. 

"I'm… not here for that," Jazz says, just the tiniest bit breathless. 

"Well," Dan says, retracting his hand so that Jazz sways into it. 

Jazz is a wonderful little sub, perfectly easy to rile up. Dan is almost disappointed that they aren't here for him tonight. Still, there's always another Friday. 

"I came here because Lucian wants to know if you have something planned for tonight. He has a surprise for you." 

"Lucian?" 

Lucian is another dom that frequents _Body Electric_. He's here more often than Dan, and even indulges outside of the club. He's got a live-in sub in the form of a small devoted thing named Alex, and Dan has scened with them both in the past when Alex had wanted to be brought down by two of them at once. He's a good person to play with, not Dan's type obviously, but he isn't one of those Doms that tries to take over. He's a sharer, and Dan has always appreciated that. 

Jazz nods, their pretty mouth glinting with some kind of gloss. There's something sparkly on their eyelids too that Dan enjoys, but he's too intrigued by the message to get sidetracked by it.

"Why would Lucian have a surprise for me?" Dan asks. 

"Not sure," Jazz says, "will you come anyway?" 

Dan quirks an eyebrow but gestures for them to exit the booth. Jazz slides out, long legs topped by a great ass, and Dan is thankful for the view. Once they're out on the main floor, Jazz leads him across the dark room where couples are whispering into each other's ears, bodies close, making plans. Jazz opens a door at the far end. 

This is the corridor to the private rooms, each of them decked out with its own theme, accompanied by different accessories and toys. Dan has his favourites, but _Body Electric_ keeps them all clean and sanitary so any of them hold the potential for a great time. Dan is pretty much open to anything, and here, the only limits to what can unfold are your own imagination, and the consent of everyone involved. 

There is a security guy on the door as they pass. Jazz offers them a flirty little wink and a wiggle of their hips. Dan wonders how often they have tried to tempt this particular guard while he's working. It would be just like them to do something like that; they have a minxy side to them, it's one of the things Dan likes to put in line whenever they scene. Now, it makes him smirk and he laughs silently as the guard blushes and waves them through. 

"You little tease," Dan says. 

Jazz smiles, and lowers their gaze to the floor because Dan's voice has gone all low and dark of its own accord. He's had a long week, and he likes being here, sometimes he can't help himself. 

Doors to the rooms are at uneven intervals on both sides of the corridor. Occupied rooms have a single red light above the door to indicate you should not enter. The doors don't lock for the safety of members, but everyone here abides by the rules. It isn't as if there is a shortage of public displays available in other areas of the building for those looking for that kind of thing. Jazz knocks on one of the doors with a red light about halfway down the corridor and Lucian's voice calls from within, telling them to enter. 

The room is one of the tamer ones. There is a couch against one wall that can be easily flipped down into a bed, a dresser with all manner of wonderful things inside, and a St. Andrew's Cross fixed to the opposite wall. It's painted an inoffensive navy, with dark wooden flooring that runs diagonally. Most of the room is open, but there is a snug alcove towards the back that Dan knows from experience has a second, smaller seat at knee height, and some wall mounted restraints. 

Lucian is on the couch with Alex under one arm. Jazz walks over to them both and folds into a kneel at Lucian's feet. Alex smiles at them, widely, and Lucian puts a hand on the back of their neck with a gentle, rewarding squeeze. So, fetching Dan was an errand, it seems. 

"I heard you had a surprise for me," Dan says. "Is it these two lovely creatures?" 

Dan wouldn't be opposed to whatever group play Lucian is inviting him to. Jazz and Alex are both alluring in their own way, and he'd be glad to have fun with either, or both. 

"Sadly, no," Lucian says, "I have the privilege of taking care of these two this evening."

"Then what could it possibly be?" Dan says, with a chuckle. 

Lucian loves stringing things out, he's a control freak - then again, aren't they all? - and he has to have his moment, some dramatic flair. 

"Come here, sweet one." Lucian calls, voice slightly raised. 

From the alcove near the back of the room, dimly lit and shadowed, steps a slender figure Dan instantly can't take his eyes off. He's tall, his long neck is bowed with his eyes downcast, and there is something delicate in the way that he walks. His limbs are long, graceful, and his hair is swept softly off his forehead in a rich, warm auburn. 

"This is Daniel," Lucian says to him, catching him by one smooth, thin wrist as soon as he is close enough. "Show him your pretty face." 

When he looks up, Dan has to catch a gasp before it comes out. His eyes are a piercing blue, and his lips are petal-pink with a soft cupids' bow. Dan wants to do all manner of things to him all at once, and his mind floods with all of them, sending him breathless. 

"Lovely," Dan says. 

"He's yours," Lucian says. 

Dan lingers on the sweet one's face for a few more seconds, before snapping his eyes to Lucian. "What do you mean he's mine?" 

"I mean, that he asked for someone to… well. I know you like them _new_." 

Dan feels that fact zing through him, going straight to his cock. This creature is brand new, timid and delicate. 

"I see," Dan says, maintaining his composure. He makes his way across the room slowly, knowing that he wants to draw this out, there is no need to let his eagerness kill all of the lovely tension building up. The man shivers when he comes close. 

"Daniel will take good care of you," Lucian says, and drops his wrist like he's relinquishing him to Dan if he chooses.

"I will," Dan says. "May I?" 

He's lifted a hand to the man's jaw, paused before he touches him to make sure. Consent is important, it's positively thrilling, when someone gives themself over to you willingly. He doesn't understand those that would take something, rather than earn it. The trust of a submissive is the sexiest thing he can imagine. 

He nods, those blue eyes never leaving Dan's. It's fine that he's doing that, for now, but if this works out they'll have to discuss what he's allowed to look at, and when.

Dan traces his jaw with one finger, cupping the slender bone of it and swiping his thumb over his bottom lip, parting them briefly to feel the wet inside of it. He has to pull away because even that small touch is overwhelming. 

"What is your name?" Dan asks. 

"Phil." 

Dan hums. It suits him, and it's probably his real name too, which can be a novelty around here. Dan uses his real one, of course, but he isn't sure about the others. 

"How did you find him?" Dan asks Lucian, not taking his eyes off Phil. 

"He goes to university with my Alex. He got curious." 

"Is that right?" Dan is asking Phil now, who blinks at him and parts his lips. "Did you get curious about the things that go on here?" 

Phil nods. 

"Words," Dan says, "you have to use your words." 

It's the first lesson, and Dan loves teaching. 

"Yes…um, I did." 

"Yes _Sir_ ," Dan corrects him, gently. Before nodding. He takes direction well. "Okay then, Phil. What do you want to do with that curiosity?" 

He doesn't answer for a few seconds. He's got his hands twisted around themselves, long fingers intertwined, flicking at the edge of a thumbnail. He's so deliciously nervous that Dan wants to scoop him up and take care of him. 

"Sorry… Sir, what do you mean?" 

Dan hides the way Phil's casual compliance gives him a thrill. Instead, he smiles and tilts his head. "It's your choice, Phil. You can always decide. Do you want to come with me and see if we can work out some of your… curiosity?" 

Phil bites down on his lip, the wet glint of his teeth making blood rush to the surface. Dan wonders if he's always so prone to going pink and swollen, if working his mouth in some other manner might cause him to flush quite so beautifully. He desperately wants to find out. 

Phil takes a breath, his broad shoulders rise and then fall. Dan has only maybe an inch or two of height on him, but he still has to tip his head upward just that fraction to meet his eyes. 

"Yes, sir," he says, "I'd like that." 

Dan nods, and turns to Lucian. "Alright. Do you want him back when we're done?" 

"I'm sure I'll be far too preoccupied," Lucian says, but he's smiling. Jazz is running a hand up his leg and Alex has her fingers already sneaking under the waistband of his jeans. 

Phil gasps behind him, and Dan finds him staring at Alex's hand, lips parted. 

"Eyes down," Dan tells him. 

Phil's cheeks go pink at being caught, but his eyes divert to the floor. So obedient. Dan likes him already. 

"He's a big boy," Lucian says, "he can look after himself. But if I know you, you'll take good care of him." 

Lucian's hips shift as Alex wraps a hand around him, and he pushes a finger into Jazz's mouth who sucks on it eagerly. 

"Come," Dan says to Phil, "let's find somewhere a little more private." 

Phil falls into step just behind him and Dan leads him back into the corridor and out of the room. It's cooler out here, and Phil shivers, thought from anticipation or the temperature, Dan cannot yet tell. Phil is dressed modestly, jeans and a maroon button up shirt with short sleeves and small off-white dots on it, far less elegant than Dan's own black suit. He'd worn it for work, but had kept on for this evening because he likes the subtle power play it holds and he feels good in it. 

He moves a few rooms along to a door with a green light, and ushers Phil inside with a hand on the small of his back. He flicks the switch to turn on the lights inside and change the light above the door from green to red. This is their room now, for as long as they need it. 

The room is smaller than the last. It is made up as a simple bedroom, with bedside drawers and a luxurious cream bedspread with grey accent pillows. There is a small desk in a warm cherry, with a four legged wooden chair to match. There are no metal restraints on the walls, no secret alcoves with flogging stools. 

This is still a playroom, there are still things in drawers should they need them, but it is fitted out for the simple delights of bodies coming together without the need for bells and whistles. It is one of the few rooms with a window, a chiffon curtain drawn back to reveal the night skyline of the city below them. Inky black-blue sky dotted with silver stars and the blurry glow of a moon making its way full. 

Dan crosses to pull the curtain over the glass to make the room darker. Phil is hovering in the doorway, hands clasped in front of him, shoulders drawn up to his ears.

"Come," Dan says, moving to take Phil's hand in his and lead him to the bed. "Don't be scared." 

"I'm… I'm not," Phil says, and goes easily. In defiance of what he says, he is still a little hesitant and shy, but his feet make their way across the plush, springy carpet, and he sinks onto the bed as Dan pushes him down. 

"First," Dan says, running his hand from Phil's shoulder, up his neck, and pressing the pad of his thumb to the corner of Phil's mouth. "We are going to talk about some of these curiosities of yours, yes?" 

Phil nods. He shivers under Dan's touch and Dan wants so badly to take him down right here, but delicacies like Phil should be savored. This is what he does best, introducing the new ones. 

He likes their hesitation, their inquisitiveness, he likes to make his sub feel comfortable and protected, free to explore whatever depraved thoughts they might have in a safe place. 

Trust can never be understated. 

"Words, Phil," Dan reminds him, "you will learn to ask for what you want with words, and also to tell me what you _don't_ want." 

"I…" Phil bites his lip again and it pinks up, "yes, sir." 

"Good," Dan praises, and doesn't miss the way Phil shudders with it. 

Dan moves the chair from the desk and sets it in front of Phil. He sits down on it, crossing his legs and folding his hands in his lap. 

"If you want to experience how these things go there are a few rules. Everyone will have their own, I have a few I like to use with my subs, ones that I feel need to be adhered to for us both to have a good time."

"Like what?" Phil asks, and it's the first time he's spoken without being prompted so Dan doesn't mind the interruption. 

"Like... you will call me Sir while we scene. It helps to reinforce the boundary between when we are and are not playing. Outside of scenes you may call me Daniel." 

"Is that all?" 

"No," Dan smiles. "I also insist on protection for any sexual contact between us. I am tested regularly, and while I trust you will do the same if we continue to meet, or if you meet with other people here, I still consider it best practise. And finally, you will need a safe word."

"A safe word?" 

"Hm," Dan hums, "a word you will say during a scene when you wish to stop. A word that means we immediately put a stop to anything that is happening."

Phil shifts uncomfortably, chewing at the side of his thumbnail in a way that makes Dan want to reach out and stop him. He doesn't.

"Why would I need that?" Phil asks, "surely I could just ask you to stop?"

"Depending on what I am doing, you may say 'stop' when you really mean 'continue'." 

Phil's eyes go wide, nervous, and Dan smiles at him. 

"Nothing will happen here that you do not want to happen. If we choose to spend more time together, I will endeavour to learn what it is you need. Even when you might not even know it." Dan realises that what he is offering is sounding more and more like the kind of permanent arrangement he hasn't often had. He's kept someone for a few weeks running before, and he's been pretty good about anticipating his subs' needs even in that short amount of time. But something about Phil's gentleness is making him offer more than he has in the past. It's foolish, but he isn't going to stop. "It is an act of trust, to put yourself into someone's hands the way you are thinking of doing, a gift, and I don't take that lightly. A safe word should be honoured, and I promise to honour it." 

"Oh," Phil says. "Sorry I… this is a lot."

"Of course," Dan says. "You're just… curious. Right?" 

Phil looks like he's going to say something else. Dan can guess that it would be a confession about how his curiosity is more of a desire he's had for a while, because Dan recognises the hungry look in Phil's eyes, the way his body is crying out to submit, but he isn't going to make Phil say anything he doesn't want to. 

"Everything else is negotiable," Dan tells him, "you should feel free to express your own limits now, and at any other time. Okay?" 

"What if I don't know what… um, my limits are?" 

Dan sucks in a breath and crosses his legs a little tighter, pressure building in his cock at the sight of this inexperienced man before him. Who knows what experience he has outside of here, but _Body Electric_ is Dan's world, and he knows things Phil couldn't possibly have any idea of. Dan wants to give Phil all of them. 

"Then we'll find out," Dan says. "But for now… why don't we try something easy?" 

"Easy?" 

"Mm," Dan says, "I will ask you to do something for me, and you will do as I say, how about that?" 

"I… I'd like that." Phil drops his eyes to the floor, curls his fingers into fists at his sides, bracing himself. 

"Eyes up," Dan says, and delights when Phil looks back to him. They've begun already. "You can use a safe word at any time and I will stop."

"I don't know what my safe word should be," Phil says. 

"Alright," Dan says. "We can use something different for today." 

He stands, shrugging out of his jacket and hanging it over the back of the chair. Phil watches him with steady eyes, chewing on his nail the whole time. Dan undoes his cuffs and rolls his sleeves up to his elbows, popping one more button at his collar for good measure. 

Much more comfortable, he sits back down in the chair and stretches his legs out. 

"We'll just use traffic lights. You will say 'red' at any point if you want me to stop. If you want me to slow down, or you need a break, you say 'yellow'. I'll check in with you if I think you need me to and if you say 'green' I'll know you're good to continue. If you don't respond at all when I ask, I'll take that as red. Okay?"

"O-okay," Phil stammers. 

"Can you repeat that?" Dan asks. 

Phil takes a deep breath and meets Dan's eyes with a fierce determination. "Red means stop, yellow means slow down, green means I'm good." 

"Good boy," Dan says. "You learn well."

Phil's eyes flutter shut, and Dan smiles.

"Do you like that?" Dan asks, "being good?" 

"Yes, Sir," Phil says again. 

Dan glances down and Phil is unmistakably hard in his jeans. Dan almost definitely wants to get his hands on what looks like an impressive length, but for now he'll settle for looking. 

There is time. 

"Okay, Phil. I want you to come over here please." 

Phil doesn't hesitate for too long. His obedience is so immediate that he slides from the bed and Dan doesn't even have to tell him to sink to his knees. He crawls across the carpet, hips swinging, body coming to rest by Dan's feet, face expectant and dipped towards the inseam of Dan's trousers.

He seems to be preempting how this is going to go and Dan can't have that. 

"Kneel. Right there," Dan tells him. "Shirt off." 

It catches Phil off guard. He had obviously been anticipating Dan touching him, or of being asked to touch Dan, but Dan getting what he wants isn't what this is about. There will be time for his pleasure later, time even for Phil to give it to him. For now, this is about Phil, and showing him that Dan will take care of him. 

Phil kneels, sitting back on his heels, and unbuttons his shirt with shaking fingers. When the last button is free, he slides the dark fabric from his shoulders in one smooth motion. Underneath it, he is pale and smooth, a dusting of light brown chest hair in the middle. He is lean, but without too much defined muscle, his waist is trim and his shoulders broad and Dan likes it. Very much. 

Phil has his shirt balled up in his fists but he discards it when Dan tells him to. 

"Jeans too," Dan says. "You can stand to do those."

Phil rises to his feet and his body is thrumming with a nervous energy. He fumbles with the button a couple of times but manages to get it open. And then he is stepping out of his jeans, clad only in a pair of tight, black, jersey boxer shorts. 

There is more of that creamy skin on display now and Dan aches to adjust his throbbing cock where outs pressing a tent into his own trousers. 

Phil kneels back at his feet without prompting and Dan smiles at him, "you're doing good."

"T-thank you, Sir."

"You take to this so well," Dan tells him. "You could be a really magnificent sub if that's what you wanted. I'm sure there are a lot of doms at _Body Electric_ that would love to play with you." 

Phil shakes his head, eyes looking to the floor. "I don't know if I…" 

He trails off, words disappearing and Dan pauses momentarily, eyeing him to ensure Phil is still steady, that he isn't pushing him too far too quickly.

"What colour are you, Phil?" 

"Green, Sir."

"Then what is it?" 

Phil shakes his head. He is still kneeling, still obedient and still at Dan's feet, but his shoulders move with the force of something he isn't saying. 

"Use your words," Dan tells him, "be good for me." 

"I want to be good," Phil tells him. "For you. I just don't know if I want… other people. Yet." 

While it takes him aback to hear this kind of declaration so soon, Dan hums in understanding. It can be overwhelming at first, to decide that this is what you want, and Dan is careful with the new ones to make sure he is a suitable, pleasant introduction. He's subbed for people before, back in the beginning, it isn't something he's interested in now for the most part but he remembers the first time and how scary yet thrilling it had felt. He wants his new subs to experience the best that this world has to offer, and that has once or twice translated into more of a connection than he originally intended on their part, but he doesn't mind that Phil feels comfortable with him. 

"That's the beauty of this," Dan tells him, "while I'm telling you want to do, it's your choice to comply. Underneath it all, you have all the power." 

Phil doesn't answer, just keeps his eyes down to the ground. 

"You don't have to decide now," Dan says. "For now, you have been very good and have done everything I've asked so you deserve a reward." 

"Thank you, Sir," Phil says, sounding braver all the time. 

"Take out that pretty cock of yours," Dan says. 

Phil flushes, right down his chest this time and Dan loves the way that looks. He wants to know what Phil's skin would look like marked up by his paddle, or his teeth. He wants to know whether Phil goes pink when he gets fucked, or if he still looks so shy and pretty when he sucks cock. 

Maybe he'll get to find out. 

Phil pulls the elastic of his boxers down under his cock, straining over the shape of his balls. His cock is long and pink, beading precum at the slit. Phil wraps a hand around it and strokes himself slowly.

"Did I say you could touch?" Dan says. 

Phil groans softly, but he drops his hand. His cock is darkening at the head, twitching with the effort of it, aroused and uncomfortable. Dan watches him struggle for a while before he smiles. 

"Good boy," Dan says. 

Phil makes another choked noise. His hips move slightly, thrusting into mid air, growing desperate for it.

"Use your words," Dan says, "what do you want?"

"Can I?" Phil says. 

"Can you what?" 

"Please can I… touch it. Sir." 

Dan hums, and spreads his legs a little wider to ease the pressure on his own cock. 

"Since you asked so nicely," Dan says. "Go ahead." 

Phil groans in relief and begins to move his fist over his cock. 

"Slower," Dan tells him, "savour it. Don't come until I tell you." 

A line appears between Phil's brows, like it pains him to slow down, but he does it. His hips buck, pushing the wet head of his cock through the circle of his fingers, and he looks desperate for it, already on edge just from a couple of instructions. He really does get off on this, on following orders. Some people like the idea, but don't much enjoy the practise. For some, they enjoy the tease of submitting, flirt with giving themselves over, but they can never truly do it. They come to places like this and try it once or twice but they will go back to their lives with a sordid little story of the time they tried BDSM and lived to tell the tale. 

Dan can tell Phil isn't one of those people. 

Phil is the type of person that shudders just at the sound of Dan's voice, whose skin flushes with even the slightest contact. Phil was made for this, he submits because he wants to, because he enjoys it. 

Phil, like Dan, will give himself over to something bigger, to a connection with other human beings built on trust and sincerity. This is honesty, as pure as Dan can define it, and Phil is as candid as can be right now. Dan wants to be the one with the privilege of that trust, to protect it and return it, and see just how far he can take him. 

"How does it feel?" Dan asks. 

Phil's lip is pulled between his teeth, his forearm straining. He's lithe, slender, but there is a muscle flexing below the creamy skin of his wrist. His fingers are tight around his own length, the shaft pushing through, throbbing with the desperate need for release. 

"It's… good," he's breathless, words coming out in bursts as he pants and tries to calm himself. "Sir." 

Dan rises from the chair, slowly unfurling himself. Phil looks up at him from his position on his knees and Dan smiles, "you're doing so well," he says, "eyes down, though." 

Phil does as he's asked, looking down at his hand moving over his cock. It's torturously slow, but Dan can see the pleasure building in him, winding him up tight. He's trembling, thigh flexing with the effort of holding back.

Dan circles him, taking his time to survey all of the tiny details; the shift of his shoulder, his tongue darting out to wet his lip. He's a glorious picture, a tangible depiction of delicious agony. 

"Have you done this to yourself before?" he asks, "Do you deny yourself, in the privacy of your bedroom, and pretend there is someone telling you to?" 

"I—" Phil pauses, taking a breath before starting again. "I've tried. But I've never been patient enough." 

It sounds like a confession, like he's disappointed in himself and the things he isn't able to achieve. 

"Would you like to be?" Dan asks, moving around behind him, "Patient? For me." 

"Yes," Phil gasps, and his hand pauses, chest heaving. The head of his cock is shiny, flushed deep and dark and he is so close to the edge he could come at any minute. Dan can see the need for it thrumming through him, just under the surface of his skin. "For you I… I want to be good. I can be good. I can, I just—please." 

He's babbling. So far gone he has no idea what he's saying. 

"Keep moving," Dan tells him. "You've stopped." 

"I can't," Phil says, "I'll come, I can't."

"Hm," Dan hums, lips pressed together. He assesses Phil, looking him over as if in judgement from the top of his head to the bend of his knees, finding them pink from the rub of the carpet.

Phil keens, the noise zinging from his throat and out through wet lips, high pitched and needy. 

"You really aren't very patient at all," Dan says, chiding him. 

He places a hand on the back of Phil's neck and Phil groans. He drops his head, chin to chest, and leans into the touch of Dan's fingers.

The room is quiet save for the sound of Phil's breathing. Dan likes these moments, when the world shrinks down to just him and his scene partners; nothing else matters outside of this for now, just the things he's able to give, and what they are willing to take.

"You can do it," Dan says, softly, "Come on. Just a little longer." 

Phil wraps his hands around his cock again, moving so slowly and carefully. Dan feels a rush of pride for him, for pushing himself, challenging his basic urges just because Dan asked him to. 

But that can keep, there is no understanding here, no agreement to anything more than tonight and the things Phil has asked for. Dan has been the one giving the instructions, but it is Phil asking for it, begging him with every pump of his hand around his aching cock. 

Dan's own erection has gone untended, and he had no intention of paying it any mind until afterwards. He gets his pleasure from watching Phil like this, desperate to comply, to obey. He is feeding Phil's curiosity and Phil is lost in it. 

"So good for me," Dan murmurs, pushing his hand into the short hairs at the nape of Phil's neck, and then up to the longer strands on top. He tugs, gently, easing Phil's head backwards so that it is resting on Dan's thigh where he stands behind him. "You can come now." 

Phil's eyes squeeze shut, his face contorting into beautiful, miraculous pleasure and his hand moves just a touch faster. It only takes a few seconds before Phil's cock is pulsing, his release shooting from him to splatter on the floor, dribbling over his fist. 

"Good," Dan praises, and Phil makes a whimpering, pathetic noise, "so beautiful." 

When it finally finishes shuddering through him, leaving him limp and sated, Phil slumps, turning his face to press into the fabric of Dan's trousers, chest heaving. He breathes in, and Dan places his hand on the space between his shoulder blades, rubbing gently while Phil comes down. 

This bit is just as important as the rest. Contact, assurance, tending to Phil as he leaves that headspace he'd fallen into. It is a moment of pure, unadulterated trust and care, and Dan likes this almost as much as everything that came before it. 

He doesn't cuddle, necessarily, but he does offer physical contact and soft words as Phil's breathing slows. Soon, he's blinking up at Dan with a placid, calm smile, and a hazy look in his eyes that comes from the kind of release he's experienced. 

"We say thank you," Dan says, running a hand through his hair. 

"Thank you, Sir," Phil says, nuzzling into him.

Dan feels his heart flip over at the touch of the beautiful man at his feet, the one with the blue eyes and the soft mouth. He does want this again, he can admit that, but Phil has to come to him on his own terms. He won't do him the disservice of offering that to him now while he's vulnerable. 

"You are welcome," Dan says. 

When Phil is ready, Dan cleans him with a fluffy washcloth and warm water. He helps him dress with guiding movements on his arms and legs, and Phil is compliant and loose throughout each task. He smiles, the corners of his pink lips tugged upward, eyes half-lidded and sleepy. 

When they are done, Dan lets Phil sway into his arms and holds him for a moment. As Phil's body presses warmly against him, face tucked into Dan's neck, Dan realises that he wants to take care of this man, to ensure he has what he needs always. That isn't something he does, usually. Dan does not take on permanent subs, doesn't feel the desire to in the way other people do. 

For him, this has always been about seeking out a temporary connection, something to work out his week. He exercises control in this area of his life because in others he has very little. A permanent sub, someone to keep coming back to, is another kind of responsibility he doesn't know whether he's capable of. Even if it is only here at _Body Electric_. 

"We're going to get you home," Dan says, patting Phil's back and easing him away, "come on." 

Dan takes him back down the corridor, turning the light from green to yellow to indicate the room will need cleaning before being made available. There are members of staff on hand to do this periodically throughout the evening, but they are so diligent about discretion that Dan has never seen one. 

They take the lift down, Phil's face illuminated by the bright overhead lights picking out the high points of his cheekbones and the bridge of his nose in highlight. _Body Electric_ is situated on the twenty-third and twenty-fourth floors of a high-rise building. Dan doesn't know what is on the other floors, and has never thought to ask. When they reach the ground, Dan leads Phil out through a side door used only as an exit. There is a taxi rank nearby, and Dan flags one down. 

"Take my number," Dan says, slipping a card from his back pocket and pressing it into Phil's hand. "You'll text me when you are home safe. Okay?"

"Daniel Howell," Phil whispers, reading it. "You're a lawyer?" 

"Text me," Dan repeats, "when you get home." 

"Yes," Phil nods, putting the card in his pocket. "Yes, _Sir_." 

Dan offers him a warm smile, and he strokes his arm gently with the flat of his palm, shoulder to elbow. Phil shivers. Phil pulls away a second later and climbs into the taxi. Dan waves him off and lingers on the pavement until the taxi turns the corner at the end of the street. Overall, tonight has been a pleasurable, fulfilling experience and he hopes that Phil got what he needed from it. 

Dan is still wound up from it though, just a little. He turns and heads back inside _Body Electric_ to see if he can find a scene to work out the tension. He hopes he will see Phil again; there are so many things he can imagine, so many experiences he wants to give to him. Dan wants to watch him learn what this lifestyle has to offer, and to be the one to offer it. But that, like everything else, is up to Phil.


End file.
